WORKING MOM TIPS TO REMAIN BALANCED AND SUCCESSFUL
Being a working mom and trying to find time to get everything done on your to-do list is never easy.
How are you holding up playing the balancing act? You know the game where you try to have time for you, the family, work, and friends.
Here are 8 ways to reduce the anxiety of perfection and increase coping.
You will find tips on how to create your definition of balance and maximize your full potential.
Webster defines balance as an even distribution of weight enabling someone or something to remain upright and steady.
Giving your work and family life an even distribution of weight balance may difficult, but feeling balanced is not. Feeling balanced is based on your perception and what works for you. How much house works need to be done in order for you to feel accomplished?
On Instagram, I post a word balance and said…
Life can become a struggle when trying to put 100% into your family, job and side hustle. But the truth is balance not perfection. Balance is being present, giving what you can and feeling good about it. If you walk away from the house 60% cleaned, it will be ok. If you play with you kids for 2 hours before they have independent play, it’s ok. Perfection is no one’s reality. What does having a balanced means life mean to you? What does your reality look like?
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My reality of balance looks like to me
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For me as long as one floor in the house is cleaned then I made progress. And I rotate which of the 3 floors needs attention from me that week.
Since dinner also requires time, 3-4 times a week we eat home cooked meals. The crockpot invention is a godsend and making lunch from leftover saves time. Also, we tried Blue Apron which is awesome because it already comes to the house prepackaged with everything you need. The only downfall was the price, but for convenience, I will try it again. Alternatively, you can try 5 dollar meals that also come to the house without the sticker shock try $5 meal. Then there is always skipping the grocery store and conveniently have food delivered to the comfort of you own home with Amazon fresh. As a busy mom, you may not have time to run to the store and besides who doesn’t love Amazon. Head over to Amazon Fresh to send grocery directly to you home.
I don’t want to bore you with all thing thinks I slack on in my house so that I can still enjoy a movie with my husband, watch Scandal, or just relax for 10 mins in the tub alone. Ok, maybe I’m not really alone because there is a toddler in my water too but I feel alone.
Need more than just lazy ideas to make your life easier? Try these tips to go from a burnt out overworked mom to an accepting mom with balance.
1. Don’t Idealize Perfect Sue on Instagram (made that name up, if you’re a Sue don’t be offended. 😛 )
I am not a hater by any means, but have you ever seen the supermoms? She irons the clothes for the week of their four beautiful kids. Each morning there is a healthy breakfast with fruits. The house is spotless clean, I mean where to you hide the toys. Moreover, she is shape and well dress because she dedicates time for grooming.
Most people are not going show you’re their flaws. With the world of so much judgemental, I don’t blame them. Which leads me into point two.
2. Remove the Shamers, Judger, and Bullies from Your Life ASAP.
When I was pregnant with Des, I belonged to an October Baby Club. And boy where these moms MEAN and JUDGMENTAL. The sensitive topics were around sleep training, breast vs bottle-feed, and attachment parent vs independent parenting, backward car seat vs forward, and the list can go on. I joined the baby group to in hopes to bond, exchange stories, be supportive, and create friendships. WRONG. They were biting each other heads off and some of it felt like high school bullying.
But why? We were all new moms, we struggle with sleep, we cry from exhaustion, but we love our children.
It was a good thing they were behind an app that I eventually deleted. But what if they were in your circle of friends? How to do you handle it? If this is you then you must definitely take the time out to read 5 ways you know it’s time to let your friend go. Yup, it’s that simple! Because no mom should feel bad about her parenting style.
Unless it’s something horrific that involved child protective services. I talking about normal moms who love their child and are trying the best they can. It’s a good thing God gave us freedom of choice; otherwise, we will all be robots doing the same thing.
3. Understand your Family Dynamic Maybe Different
There are many factors make other families different no wonder there are so many variations of a family.
I am not hard on myself because I work a full-time job because I understand that I need to pay back my school loans. Some mothers are single moms who need to play both roles. Or working moms because they are not fulfilled by staying home with their child all day.
While another mom enjoys staying home with kids instead of working.
As both a stay at home mom for one child and a working mom for the other, I understand the pros and con for each debate. And trust me, the grass is brown on both sides. Moms will always be sacrificing something.
I breastfed one child and bottle-feed the other.
I am fine with each decision I made. Besides, the decisions are for you and your family needs not for the outside world to validate.
4. Join a Facebook Group of Women Who Understand
You should know you are not alone when feeling overwhelmed and unbalanced.
Facebook groups are a great way to reach out to others trying to find the same work-home balance. I love the setting because they have rules, some are groups are private, the women are respectful and you can foster friendships. My favorite Mom Facebook group is BOSS MOMS which is a network of all parenting styles with one thing in common… becoming your own boss. But, if that’s not your lane then check out Facebook Parenting groups every mom should follow.
5. Say No or Reschedule
There is no possible way to achieve balance if you continue to add an extra task to your list.
You took off for the day to catch up on some task on your to-do list. You have seven things scheduled out if things run smoothly. So far, it’s 1 o’clock and you have 2 hours to complete organizing the doctor’s visit for the next 6 months and cooking dinner.
Suddenly you get a phone call from one of your girlfriend. Do you answer? Do you text back and say I’ll call you shortly? No, you answer the phone and she begins to tell you she needs a ride to pick her car up from the shop. What do you do?
It’s in that moment you have to practice either saying no or reschedule for later in the day.
To feel balanced you have to know your limit. And don’t take on more than you can handle.
Therefore, you tell your friend how is 5 after the kids come home and ate dinner. She then says no problem I’ll ask Karen. Your true friend will never make you feel guilty for missing a few events or talking on the phone every day. You true friends understand you and know you are just keeping sane.
6. Let Go of the Guilt and Find Acceptance
Accept that there will be good and bad days.
No one wakes up thinking today will be the worst day ever.
Today, I will drag the kids out of bed in the morning. Fuss with the toddler about why today is not a good day for a dress. Or why she doesn’t like her hairstyle and wants it done over. How many times do you have to ask your child did they really brush their teeth and you mean with toothpaste.
You don’t want to leave your lunch home for the day. Or spill coffee on your outfit before the meeting. I mean really who ever dreams the day will turn out to be so horrid.
Then there is homework, clothes, dinners, my time, couple time. And don’t mention juggling the creation of a side business.
May not be the day you imagined but it’s the day that occasionally happens. It’s when the balance scale just completely topples over.
If you haven’t seen Bad Moms, I suggest you purchase it NOW. It will definitely make you feel understood and have a much-needed laugh.
Let’s be honest balance is not being 100 percent everywhere all the time. I
Most working moms have found ways to be efficient in both worlds. They were able to come to terms with their family choices and focus top priorities.
7. Develop a Good Routine
A good morning routine and a nighttime routine is essential when trying to keep things in order. I created a printable for kids to make morning and nights run smoothly. Print out your printable here. You can check out my hectic but organized routine here.
8. Sync Calendars and Organize Schedules
These are helpful apps that I have tried so far that is worth downloading. They are free and have a desktop version for additional resources.
Google calendar app, I absolutely love. This allows me to invite my husband to my calendar to see upcoming events and appointments.
Google Keeps syncs notes with anyone. Each person has access to edit the document. We use this for our grocery list. Therefore, when one adds or deletes grocery on the list, it updates the note.
Evernote is great for organizing your notes and web clips. This saves online forms, documents, website pages and scans documents. It also has a great system for searching categories and tasks. Check out Evernote for a more streamlined and modern way to organize.
Asana but so far it great for breaking down goals into sub-goals and action task. Then add the goals to your calendar to ensure do stay on task.
Whether you are a working mom or work from home mom, you will feel guilt and stress from trying to balance your work and home life. By getting focus, having a plan and finding a organize pattern can help reduce overwhelm. In addition, understand your family dynamic, defined what balance means to you can make things easier. What tips can you share that keeps you from overexerting yourself and maintain a balance?